Friday, April 10, 2009

An Interview with Angela Kopp

When I arrived at work this morning, I found a man with a ladder in the spot where my office chair normally resides. Since the man was intently investigating something in the empty black space above the ceiling panels, I holed up in one of our firm's computer cubbies on the 26th floor. And while in this windowless, oddly lighted space, I interviewed my friend and colleague Angela Kopp.

CGC: If the Hodag (see above) weren't a cross between a cat and a stegosaurus, what combination of beasts would it be?

AJK: The Hodag should embody the spirit of northern Wisconsin. I'm picturing a Pan-like creature where the top is one thing and the bottom is another. The top: an ax-wielding, cheap-brandy-drinking, red-and-black-plaid-wearing lumberjack with an unkempt beard and strong body odor. He is, as my dad would say, tougher'n hell. He is also a lot like my aunt's ex-husband. The bottom: a fat, fat ass and chunky legs in green-and-gold Packer pants.

CGC: Why are Swedes cooler than Germans?

AJK: I'm the wrong person to answer this question. I don't like being Swedish.

CGC: When you were doing your Ph.D. in Physics, what was the most boring thing you learned?

AJK: I don't know. It was all so boring that I've forgotten most of it.

CGC: How come there's a bar with a bocce ball court in Brooklyn but not in Manhattan?

AJK: In some parts of Brooklyn you have a population of young semi-hipsters, often from outside New York, who tend to romanticize the working class communities they've invaded. I think that's why they like going to a bar where they can play bocce; it makes them feel more connected to the (once predominantly Italian) neighborhood they live in. Of course there are young semi-hipsters in Manhattan too, they're just not as sentimental.

CGC: Who is the coolest Wisconsinite of all time?

AJK: Russ Feingold, the only senator to vote against the Patriot Act. All those so-called liberals from the coasts can kiss his midwestern ass!

CGC: Thanks, Angela.

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