Monday, August 17, 2009

Quotes of the Week: Alpine Style

Bonjour! I returned from the alpine heart of Europe late last night (NCT jetted off to his next adventure in Africa), and am just beginning to delve into emails, snail mail, laundry, grocery-shopping, and all the other post-trip chores that await the weary traveler. Before I embark on those less-than-fun tasks, however, I thought I'd post the trip's quotes for your reading pleasure. As a result, voici mon Quotes Of The Week, à la les Alps! 
On the predilection of French male hikers for wearing very short running shorts
CGC: "I guess they're the hiking equivalent of the speedo."
In the communal male/female bathroom at the Refuge du Miage
French child: "[unintelligible]."
NCT: "Je ne comprende pas."
French child: "[unintelligible]."
NCT: "I don't understand what you're saying."
French child: "[unintelligible]."
NCT: "You want me to lift you up?"
Two Dutch hikers discussing their ascent of the Col du Tricot
DH: "I was like, 'Beam me up, Scotty'."
While eating lunch at the Col de Fours (2665 meters), and watching a comical parade of French teenagers ascend from the other side
CGC: "That guy looks miserable."
NCT: "You would too if you were wearing capris and a polo shirt."
On catching the bus in Ferret, Switzerland
CGC to a waiting couple: "Where's the bus driver?"
WC: "He took his donkey for a walk."
While riding up a bone-shattering rocky road in Switzerland in the aforementioned bus
NCT: "God bless the WPA and its god-honest roads."
While hiking up the Fenêtre d'Arpette
CGC: "How would you define an android?"
NCT: "An artificial human."
CGC: "So it has to be intentionally human-like?"
NCT: "Have you seen I, Robot?"
CGC: "No."
NCT: "Blade Runner?"
CGC: "No."
NCT: "C3P0?"
CGC: "Okay."
[Two minutes of silence pass.]
NCT: "Well I guess you don't have as much cultural capital as you thought, Jane Austen."
In a Trient dinnertime conversation with LR and MH, while discussing Chamonix
LR: "You've been there before?"
CGC: "No, but I know where the Patagonia store is."
While hiking into Chamonix Valley on the last day
NCT: "I think I just accidentally blew a snot rocket."
CGC: "If it was accidental how was it a rocket?"
LR: "It was a snot propeller plane. It had two fat ends."
After hearing the Anglo-Saxon riddle of the one-eyed garlic seller
NCT: "That is the worst riddle I have ever heard."
In the Jardin Anglais in Geneva
NCT: "My favorite thing about France so far is that lunar forklift thing right there."
[Ten seconds pass.]
NCT: "Even though we're in Switzerland."
NCT: "When someone asks me if I want something and I don't, I just say, 'C'est bonne.' It's like, 'Let it ride'."
CGC: "I can't wait to get home and watch The Sound of Music."

1 comment:

  1. Oh my goodness. Thank you so much for these!!! I haven't laughed that hard in quite awhile! I laughed so hard that Doug made me read them out loud to him, since he was wondering what was making me heave with silent laughter... ;) We're about to ditch our bikes and complete the final week of our journey in a rental car.